Please Read

The following blog posts are based solely on my personal experiences. I am not a Doctor, Nutrition specialist, Comedian, or Professional Baseball Player. If you have a health, nutrition, humor, or baseball issue please seek a PROFESSIONAL.

Favorite Bathrooms

  • Home Sweet Home
  • When I'm @ someones house: the one farthest away from the crowd
  • @ the Mall: Macy's (as public bathrooms go this one is very nice)
  • If I can't make it to Macy's...JC Penney's will have to do (they recently remodeled so it is better than it was. I don't know why they didn't ask for my input???)
  • Monterey Bay Fish Grotto in Monroeville has a great bathroom
  • Ponte Vedra Inn and Club, My fav place to vacation, their rooms have the most wonderful bathrooms

Helpful links

  • FREE Crohns Disease Support Network
  • Find a Toilet
  • Medical Alert Restroom Access Pass

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Some Random Thoughts:

Some random thoughts while I prep for my Colonoscopy!!!!
I hate colonoscopys
I hate Crohns
When people find out I have Crohns they usually say “Well you look Great”
I wonder if healthy people ever get told “Well you look horrible”???
Making Jello
Crohns makes a Friday crappy!!! & Sat. & Sun. & Mon. & Tues. & Wed. & Thurs
Orange Jello
How can a somewhat good day go so bad so fast??? Crohns thats how!!!
A Clear Liquid Diet:
Clear liquids consist of water, apple juice, black tea, black coffee, gingerale, bouillon, broth, gelatin (i.e. Jell-O – not red), and Popsicles (not red). No solids or dairy products. Anything not appearing on this list is not allowable and, if taken, may lead to the cancellation of your procedure
How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
Drinking Tea
When you have crohns a surprise is not always a good thing…just saying
Just the thought of drinking this toxic waste cleans me out!!!
Drinking it…………….
Nausea, burping, pooping, Nausea, burping, pooping, Nausea, burping, pooping,
Nothing says "you're a loser" more than owning a motivational poster about being a winner.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh be right back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lemon Italian Ice
If a pretty poster & a cute saying are all it takes to motivate you, you probably have a very easy job.The kind robots will be doing soon
Chicken Broth
There are No Stupid Questions. But there a LOT of Inquisitive Idiots
Sponge Bob is on
So if I laugh my ass off will my Crohns go away???
Laughter is the best medicine
Thank you God for laughter
More Jello
More Broth
More Italian Ice
Dear Crohns: Don't be mine
Dear Crohns, You are such a pain in the A@#
Ahhhh chai tea always makes me feel a little better :)
Dear Crohns Disease: Why do you hate my guts???
All that I’m after is a life full of laughter As long as I’m laughing with you
I Hate Needles
Isn’t this day over yet??? 6:30 pm argggggggggggggggg
Did I mention that I hate Crohns????

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Is it Crohns or is it Love?

The other day I wasn’t feeling so great and I started thinking about my symptoms, can’t eat, can’t sleep….and it hit me, the symptoms of Crohns disease are very similar to the symptoms of falling in love! So I did a little research (gotta love the internet) and here are the most common symptoms of being in love:

weak at the knees, trouble carrying out everyday tasks accurately, talk incessantly about…., restless, trembling of hands and feet, forgetfulness, insomnia, nervousness, change in appetite, tearfulness, dizziness, you know that you're in the middle of something that will change your life forever, you change your underwear more often, difficulty focusing, spend all day in bed, painful postponement of flatulent outbursts, upset stomach, cold sweats, anxious, awkward, fearful, turn pale, flush, stammer, sweat, breathe faster, suddenly no extra money, you can hardly think of anything else.

So I hope if you have any of the above symptoms it is because you are in love and not because you have Crohns disease. Hey maybe its not Crohns….maybe I’m just in love with my toilet???

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

An Update and a Special Request

I am happy to report that this week I am feeling a little better. Still exhausted but the joint pain is not as bad, I have less nausea, and I think I went an entire day without a headache. I am hoping the next three days will continue to be good ones because, are you sitting down, on Sunday I have to prep for my colonoscopy!!! Blahhhhhhh!!! So think of me in my corner sipping my clear liquids and toxic waste but try not to picture me running to the bathroom.

I am also happy to report that I (with the help of my wonderful husband) made my first loaf of gluten free cinnamon raisin bread last weekend and it is very good. I am so happy to have some bread in my life again and I am looking forward to finding/making other wonderful gluten free foods.

Now I would like to ask a favor. If you happen to have an extra $5.00 or are looking for a wonderful cause to support please consider making a donation to a fellow crohnie who is participating in the Take Steps for Crohn’s & Colitis walk this summer. You can donate online at:

More than 1.4 million patients across the country suffer from Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis. Beyond raising money for research, Take Steps brings together the community in a fun and energetic atmosphere. Participants are encouraged to make noise and be heard—raising awareness of these little known diseases.
If you are able to please consider supporting their efforts by making a tax deductible contribution.

Your support of even $5.00, will help fund important research and raise awareness of diseases that affect millions of people.

Another way you can help spread awareness:

If you have a twitter account on 3/14 please use #Crohns at the end of all your tweets in hopes of a trending topic to spread awareness.

Thank you so much

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

You Know You Have IBD When:

This has made its way around the internet so you may have seen it already but it is always good for a laugh. Leave me a comment and let me know which #s describe you to a tee…enjoy

You Know You Have IBD When:

1. You know where all the cleanest restrooms are, and have favorites.
2. You're always being told, "I don't think you should eat that ."
3. You hear people say, well you don't look sick.
4. You can slam your foot, hand, or whatever in a car door and it really does not hurt, cause you are used to pain that makes that seem like nothing.
5. You have a good idea what it would be like to actually starve.
6. You have favorite toilet paper.
7. You have more photos of your insides than the outside.
8. You have a favorite arm for i.v's.
9. You know that wearing white could be a really big mistake.
10. It makes you happy to go any number less then 15 times a day.
11. You have a favourite Ensure flavor.
12. People ask about your guts before they ask about your family.
13. Most of your shopping cart is toilet paper/cottonelle wipes.
14. The world falls out of your bottom, rather than the other way round.
15. You always have wet wipes and tissues with you.
16. You give directions via toilets rather than by pubs.
17. Your friends and family know how things are by looking at your plate.
18. Your closet contains more stretch pants than jeans.
19. You can be sexy looking in the morning and seem 5 months pregnant by afternoon.
20. You can think about eating something and know whether or not it will come back at you.
21. You need a closet to organize your prescription meds.
22. You can outburp a truck driver.
23. You name and talk to your toilet.
24. You are a guy and you now understand natural childbirth.
25. You are a mom and you wait to drink your coffee or eat until
your kids are at school already.
26. You are told how great you look as you near deaths door.
27. Are up all night organizing the house on steroids.
28. Someone says, oh yes I have IBS too!
29. You hit your 8th grade weight.
30. You talk to your doctor more than your spouse.
31. The lab tech knows you by name.
32. The pharmacist sends you a thank you card.
33. You have to fast for 3 hours prior to make it through the grocery store.

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Sunday, February 21, 2010

In My Own Little Corner

Do you know that song from Rogers and Hammerstein’s version of Cinderella “In My Own Little Corner”? That should be my theme song. I seem to spend all my time these days tucked into the corner of my couch with my laptop to my left and the TV remote to my right (except when I’m in the bathroom of course). Not quite the same as Cinderella’s corner but still it’s a corner and I always seem to be in it. Occasionally I find someone else in my corner and well let me just tell you they aren’t there for long if they know what’s good for them.

In my own little corner in my own little chair
I can be whatever I want to be.
On the wings of my fancy I can fly anywhere
and the world will open its arms to me.

I really need to get my energy back and get out of this corner.

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Another crappy day….pun intended

This is not a good day. Dragged myself out of bed this morning. Two hour delay for the school district so I crawled back to bed. Dragged myself out of bed again. I started off with just joint pain but its joint pain that is off the charts. Almost brought me to tears today. The monster in my gut seemed to be sleeping but now it is stirring too. GO BACK TO SLEEP!!!

I scheduled my colonoscopy (woop) for March 1st. I am anxious to see if there has been any improvement since being on the Cimzia. I have a bad feeling that the Cimzia is what is causing the horrible joint pain. I have had joint pain for many years but never ever this bad and earlier this month when I had to postpone my injections because of my head cold I noticed my joints were starting to feel better. When my head cold was gone I got my injections and a few days later the joint pain was back. I tried to get an appointment with the rheumatoid doc. today but silly me I called during their hour and a half lunch time. I couldn’t call back because I had to drag myself to the high school and work the concession stand, although if it weren’t for my commitment to help the coach I would probably never leave the house. How sad is that! So I will try to call the doctor tomorrow. Better days are coming…..Right???

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Monday, February 15, 2010

Some good news:

I’ve been stressing for the past couple months. My husband works for a small company that is struggling through the rough economy. In an effort to save money the bean counter (small comp. = 1 bean counter) was considering switching health insurance providers to a provider that 3 of my doctors do not accept. 2 of those doctors are my GI and my surgeon and they are both the best doctors that I have found so far. The company was presented with an offer from a provider that was significantly less expensive and understandably needed to be considered for the benefit of the company. One of the perks of small companies is that the powers that be know you and your situation well. The owner of the company (and even the bean counter) was very concerned about me having to change doctors and asked me to check with my doctors before they had to make their final decision. My husband told them about my doctors but told them not to worry. If the new insurance company would save them that much money they should switch and my doctors would be able to recommend other good doctors for me. So they continued to look into the new insurance and I put off scheduling some of the tests I needed done in case I would have to schedule them with different doctors. All the employees had to fill out a personal and family medical history form. After this was done the insurance provider quoted the company a new price that was much higher than their original quote. (they probably took one look at my medical history and said raise the price) The good news is THEY AREN’T GOING TO SWITCH!!! I can keep all my doctors woo hoo. Now I have to schedule the rest of the wonderful tests on the to do list from my wonderful doctor.

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Friday, February 12, 2010

To Be Or Not To Be Gluten Free?

About 3 weeks ago I started eliminating gluten from my diet. This was not as easy as it sounds. I absolutely love bread. Toast with lots of butter in the morning or toast and tea when I’m not feeling well. A warm roll with butter at dinner. Sandwiches, I love a good sandwich. B’s grilled cheese yummmm. Not to mention cookies, brownies, cake…….. Well I managed to stop eating all of the above and I noticed an improvement right away. I started looking for gluten free foods at the grocery store. Rice Chex cereal is gluten free so that has been my breakfast. I tried some very expensive gluten free bread….I think the bag would have tasted better. I won’t buy that again, at least not that brand. Rice cakes aren’t too bad with peanut butter. Rice crackers are a no by themselves but not too bad with homemade ham salad. I had that for lunch yesterday. I think they will be good with cheese however that is the next food group I was thinking of eliminating….I love cheese :( I bought a gluten free cookie mix from Betty Crocker but I haven’t tried it yet. I cheated a couple days ago and had some bread and some brownies during a snowed in party. The verdict…… I need to be gluten free.

I found some good resources on the internet. I’ve been following these blogs

Now I just need some willpower!!!

If you know of any helpful web sites please leave a comment with the link. Thanks!

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Monday, February 8, 2010

Because of Crohns…..

I have very bad headaches that almost always turn into horrible migraines. What? You have very bad headaches and or migraines but you do not have Crohns? Yes unfortunately that is possible and I’m sure if I didn’t have Crohns I might still have the occasional very bad headache that turns into a migraine. Why do I claim that my very bad headaches/migraines are because of Crohns? I thought you would never ask :) Here is how it goes. I have Crohns. One of the “perks” of having Crohns means that if I eat I will require quick access to a bathroom not just once but many times. As you can imagine this makes going places a bit difficult especially if you can’t or don’t want to spend most of your time in the bathroom. My solution over the years has been “don’t eat”. This worked well at first. I could spend an entire weekend on a baseball field with only strategically planned sips of water. Understandably after doing this for a couple years my body said enough of this. Now if I don’t eat for even half a day I start to get a headache and if I don’t get to food quickly the headache turns into a very bad headache at which point it is too late for food and I am on my way to the horrible migraine. If I can’t get to food I’ll try to take a Tylenol as soon as I feel the headache coming on but Tylenol rarely helps and it’s the only thing I’m allowed to take. Aspirin and Ibuprofen are a no no for Crohnies (I do cheat sometimes and take an Ibuprofen especially when I have a headache for days and days in a row.

Going to the grocery store…don’t eat. Going to a baseball game…definitely don’t eat. Going to the mall…I will eat now and try to stay close to the nice bathrooms. Going to…well you get the picture.

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Monday, February 1, 2010


I have a bad head cold with the works…sore throat, earache, headache, congestion, congestion, congestion, and my body aches all over. I spent the entire weekend vegging out on the couch. I have to find some energy today. I have to take B to the doctors. He has a small lump near his scar from his surgery last august. Please pray that the cyst isn’t back.

And now I would like to propose a new law….

Anyone who suffers from a chronic illness should not have to experience the common cold!!!

What do you think? Cast your YES/NO vote below :)

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is