Please Read

The following blog posts are based solely on my personal experiences. I am not a Doctor, Nutrition specialist, Comedian, or Professional Baseball Player. If you have a health, nutrition, humor, or baseball issue please seek a PROFESSIONAL.

Favorite Bathrooms

  • Home Sweet Home
  • When I'm @ someones house: the one farthest away from the crowd
  • @ the Mall: Macy's (as public bathrooms go this one is very nice)
  • If I can't make it to Macy's...JC Penney's will have to do (they recently remodeled so it is better than it was. I don't know why they didn't ask for my input???)
  • Monterey Bay Fish Grotto in Monroeville has a great bathroom
  • Ponte Vedra Inn and Club, My fav place to vacation, their rooms have the most wonderful bathrooms

Helpful links

  • FREE Crohns Disease Support Network www.CrohnsDiseaseSN.com
  • Find a Toilet www.sitorsquat.com
  • Medical Alert Restroom Access Pass http://myibd.org/restroommedalert/index.php

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Envy

Envy, jealousy, desire, wish for, want, longing, yearning, need……….what could inspire all these feelings in me? I’m thinking of someone, someone I know well (whose name I shall change to protect him/her). I will call him/her Isaac. He/she is young but that’s not why. He/she is handsome but that’s not why. He/she is athletic but that’s not why. He/she has a beautiful smile but that’s not why. He/she is funny but that’s not why. He/she almost never has an urgency to go to the bathroom!!! Yes it’s true that is what I envy. He/she rarely concerns himself/herself with the when or where. It’s a given that he/she will go maybe once or twice a day. He/she often has the freedom to choose where and when to go. “Fiddle-dee-dee I have to go but I will wait till I get home” hahaha is that really possible. I don’t remember??? And even after waiting hours till he/she is home there still is no great urgency. Isaac slowly casually enters the house, walking upstairs. So little urgency in fact that Sir Isaac often takes his/her good old time, allowing gravity to do all the work. But wait….what’s that noise….someone frantically banging on the door….HURRY UP I HAVE TO GO NOW…. Hahaha. I’m sure all of you can guess who the person is banging on the door. Some of you may even know who Isaac is but please don’t give his/her identity away or he/she may not hurry up the next time someone is frantically banging on the door…….

Love, laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is (unless you’re an Isaac then just love, laugh, and hurry up :)

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